Bless us, O Lord, and these Thy gifts which we are about to receive from Thy bounty, through Christ our Lord. Amen.

I said that prayer, or heard it said, three times a day for the first eleven years of my life, and many times after that. It's the "standard" Catholic Grace Before Meals. Recently someone requested that we write an article about "saying grace", and how we fit it into our Bahá'í lives.

Invoking the Lord's blessing before meals is common to all of Christianity, however much other doctrines may diverge. The Catholic Encyclopedia quotes the Jewish form of grace before meals: "Let us give thanks to Adonai our God", and further cites St. Paul in First Corinthians: "Whether you eat or drink, or whatsoever else you do, do all to the glory of God" (10:31). The Church Fathers were quick to follow St. Paul's directive. According to the Catholic Encyclopedia: "Christian archaeology has collected a large number of cup-bases on which may be read a short prayer, e.g. 'Drink in Christ', 'Drink piously'...". One of the first actual "graces" is found in a fourth-century treatise and is attributed to St. Athanasius, but is not the modern Catholic prayer.

However, some way to thank the Creator for His gifts is common to the world over. Gathering-hunting cultures worldwide have prayers to thank the spirit of the plants and animals who die to furnish them with food. Libation—the ritual pouring of a liquid such as wine, olive oil, or honey—from one's cup as an offering to the gods is likewise widespread, recorded among cultures as widely separated as ancient Greece and Peru. So it seems clear that the essence of "saying grace" was brought to us by the earliest Manifestations, whose Names we do not know, and who taught us that most basic of religious concepts: thanksgiving.

So: does this old idea still apply, and what do we do with it now? In the compilation Lights of Guidance, we find:

He does not feel that the friends should make a practice of saying grace or of teaching it to children. This is not part of the Bahá'í Faith, but a Christian practice, and as the Cause embraces members of all races and religions we should be careful not to introduce into it the customs of our previous beliefs. Bahá'u'lláh has given us the obligatory prayers, also prayers before sleeping, for travellers, etc. We should not introduce a new set of prayers He has not specified, when He has given us already so many, for so may occasions.

(Lights of Guidance #1501, p. 459; from a letter written on behalf of Shoghi Effendi to an individual believer, September 27, 1947)

I have often lamented, with regard to these sorts of compilations, the lack of the original question. We have absolutely no idea of the question or the context in which it was asked and are thus missing half the information. Because, in this instance, in the old three-volume edition of Tablets of 'Abdu'l-Bahá, this appears:

May be said before meals:

O my Lord, my Hope!

Praise be unto Thee, for Thou hast sent down unto us this spiritual table, supreme benefit and heavenly blessing. O our Lord! Strengthen us to partake of this heavenly food, so that its fine essence may run through the pillars of our spiritual being and that we may thereby obtain a celestial power for serving Thy Cause, promulgating Thy signs and adorning Thy vineyard with lofty trees, the fruits whereof shall be near (to gather) and of perfuming fragrances. Verily Thou art the Possessor of great bounty! Verily Thou are the Clement, the Merciful!

May be said after meals:

O my Lord, my Hope!

Thanks be unto Thee for these foods and benefits. O Lord! Suffer us to ascend to Thy Kingdom and to sit at the tables of thy divine world. Nourish us with the foods of Thy meeting and cause us to attain to the sweetness of beholding Thy beauty, for as much as this is the utmost wish, the mightiest gift and the greatest bestowal. O Lord, O Lord! Make this feasible unto us. Verily Thou art the Beneficent, the Giver! Verily Thou art the Bestower, the Mighty, the Merciful.

('Abdu'l-Bahá, Tablets of 'Abdu'l-Bahá, v. 1, p. 167-8)

Hmm. The question begged is, of course, what did "saying grace" mean to the writer of the letter to Shoghi Effendi? Did they, as Dale suspects, mean by "saying grace" the recitation of a set prayer at the beginning of a meal, as in the Catholic grace I was taught, and Shoghi Effendi told them not to do that? I find it peculiar that Shoghi Effendi, who after all studied religions at Oxford University, would describe "saying grace" as "a Christian practice" unless he was asked about a specific prayer. Surely he would have learned of equivalent forms belonging to other religious traditions? And why did 'Abdu'l-Bahá reveal a prayer suitable for saying before meals, and one suitable for afterward? Did He say they were suitable for that purpose, or did someone else? Is this in fact a "Bahá'í grace"? A case might be made that 'Abdu'l-Bahá revealed these prayers for Westerners who were accustomed to saying prayers at mealtime, but in the final analysis He did reveal these prayers. Should we not use them? Did he reveal them just so we had something to say until we got used to the practice of not praying before meals? Does Shoghi Effendi really mean we should just park ourselves and eat and not bother thanking anyone or anything? Does that seem right, either? Are we only supposed to thank and honor God at other times?? Is mealtime, perhaps, not the time to thank God for His gifts?

It seems to me that any prayer revealed by 'Abdu'l-Bahá might as well be used. That sounds a bit flip, but I think that getting too heavily into 'Abdu'l-Bahá's possible motive is seriously missing the point. Also, somewhere it's recorded—I can't find it in Ocean—that 'Abdu'l-Bahá preceded His own meals with the phrase, "In the Name of God". Apparently even He never stopped marking the occasion with prayer. Isn't "In the Name of God" a grace, too, like the Catholic grace? Isn't it thanking God for the food, and asking a blessing on those at the table? Or is it something different?

If you're confused, raise your hand. Me, too.

Now, we could beat Shoghi Effendi with 'Abdu'l-Bahá, or the other way around, but neither seems like a good solution. So, back to the original question—what do we do? How do we fit the idea of saying grace into our Bahá'í lives? I'll tell you a story. You'll laugh, or cringe, or maybe both. (They say a little knowledge is a dangerous thing.) When I was a baby Bahá'í, I used the Noon Prayer as a sort of grace before lunch. It was just the kids and me, so I didn't have to worry about offending or embarrassing anyone. After I knew better what was I was supposed to be doing with this prayer, I stopped, but I don't suppose it did any lasting damage, and Andrea could say the Noon Prayer when she was five years old!

I don't say the Noon Prayer for a luncheon blessing anymore, but sometimes there still seems to be a hole there. Frequently I fill in with 'Abdu'l-Bahá's "In the Name of God"—short and to the point, rather like when my mom taught me to make the Sign of the Cross on my lips when I wanted to say grace at public school but didn't want to look like a complete weirdo. (Dale says his friend Bruce, a Mormon, used to say grace at school lunchtime, and you could tell because he would go silent for a minute and his eyes would kind of roll up in his head. The other guys all respected his moment of prayer, which I think is saying a lot for high-school guys.) If I'm feeling nostalgic, I've been known to say Catholic grace and leave out the part about Jesus. One of my cross-stitch projects is a piece done in a sort of Blue Willow style, with a couple of children outside under the trees, a dog and cat and birds in attendance, and the prayer: "Be present at our table, Lord/Be here and everywhere adored/Thy creatures bless, and grant that we/May feast in paradise with Thee". It's not finished yet, but it's slated for the dining room. (By the way, if anyone knows the origin of this grace, please let me know—it sounds vaguely Anglican/Episcopalian to me, but until I saw the chart I'd never heard it.)

We do say one official "grace" per year, on Thanksgiving Day, when Dale, as paterfamilias, is assigned to say a blessing. Some years he cheats and reads something from the Writings, but sometimes he composes something for the occasion. On Thanksgiving Day 2002, after the twin shocks of 9/11 and almost losing Andrea to an abruption, I read out what seems to me to be a canticle of thanks from Prayers and Meditations (CLXXXIV, almost at the end of the book), and Melissa and I were both sniffing before I was done. When my in-laws are in town for graduations or weddings or whatever, we usually ask Dale's father to ask the blessing for us.  (Dale's family doesn't use the term "say grace"; they "ask the blessing", and as far as I know they always have.)  Most of the rest of the time it's catch as catch can, although now and again I try to institute something more formal.  Things I've done in the past include:

• Saying that prayer by 'Abdu'l-Bahá
• Reading one Hidden Word per evening
• Reading a passage that's struck me somehow
• Saying "In the Name of God"

Nothing in particular has taken hold, though, so most evenings we just wing it, and, frankly, most of the time we (*gasp*) don't do anything at all.  Maybe someday we'll hit upon a system, but until then it's up for grabs.

To anyone grappling with this question, all I can say is:  follow your instincts.  There's nothing in the Writings that says we can't say something before we eat; there's nothing that says we have to.  To follow 'Abdu'l-Bahá's example would suggest that we are to do something to express thanks and ask God's blessing upon us, but whether we do so simply or more elaborately is our choice.  Many prayers that we grew up with, such as the children's classic "God is great, God is good/Let us thank Him for our food/By His hand we all are fed/Give us, Lord, our daily bread" seem to me to be acceptable from a Bahá'í perspective.  I would have no qualms teaching them to a group of Bahá'í children; indeed, I feel that it is good for Bahá'í children to know not only the Our Father/Lord's Prayer but some of the other prayers used by their Christian peers, strictly from the standpoint of fostering a sense of fellowship.  Table graces are also a good area in which to exercise one's skill at composition and extempore prayer.  If you're not entirely comfortable, after converting, with saying a grace you grew up with but want something a bit more than "In the Name of God", you might try making up your own prayer.  Or search through a compilation of prayers from multiple religions (there are many available) to find one that you like.  Or you could even say 'Abdu'l-Bahá's prayer!

In short, it seems to me that since prayer thanking God for what He has given us is such a fundamental part of our common religious heritage, if we want to keep up the tradition, there's no reason not to.  While I searched through Ocean for helpful quotes, I found this, which although it doesn't specifically mention table grace falls very much within the subject under consideration:

I am greatly pleased to see you. Your hearts are illumined by the lights of Bahá. This meeting is in reality a divine, celestial assembly under the favor of God, for we have no other purpose than praising and meeting God. The prayer you have just offered is a prayer of thankfulness.

Thankfulness is of various kinds. There is a verbal thanksgiving which is confined to a mere utterance of gratitude. This is of no importance because perchance the tongue may give thanks while the heart is unaware of it. Many who offer thanks to God are of this type, their spirits and hearts unconscious of thanksgiving. This is mere usage, just as when we meet, receive a gift and say thank you, speaking the words without significance. One may say thank you a thousand times while the heart remains thankless, ungrateful. Therefore, mere verbal thanksgiving is without effect. But real thankfulness is a cordial giving of thanks from the heart. When man in response to the favors of God manifests susceptibilities of conscience, the heart is happy, the spirit is exhilarated. These spiritual susceptibilities are ideal thanksgiving.

There is a cordial thanksgiving, too, which expresses itself in the deeds and actions of man when his heart is filled with gratitude. For example, God has conferred upon man the gift of guidance, and in thankfulness for this great gift certain deeds must emanate from him. To express his gratitude for the favors of God man must show forth praiseworthy actions. In response to these bestowals he must render good deeds, be self-sacrificing, loving the servants of God, forfeiting even life for them, showing kindness to all the creatures. He must be severed from the world, attracted to the Kingdom of Abhá, the face radiant, the tongue eloquent, the ear attentive, striving day and night to attain the good pleasure of God. Whatsoever he wishes to do must be in harmony with the good pleasure of God. He must observe and see what is the will of God and act accordingly. There can be no doubt that such commendable deeds are thankfulness for the favors of God.

Consider how grateful anyone becomes when healed from sickness, when treated kindly by another or when a service is rendered by another, even though it may be of the least consequence. If we forget such favors, it is an evidence of ingratitude. Then it will be said a loving-kindness has been done, but we are thankless, not appreciating this love and favor. Physically and spiritually we are submerged in the sea of God's favor. He has provided our foods, drink and other requirements; His favors encompass us from all directions. The sustenances provided for man are blessings. Sight, hearing and all his faculties are wonderful gifts. These blessings are innumerable; no matter how many are mentioned, they are still endless. Spiritual blessings are likewise endless--spirit, consciousness, thought, memory, perception, ideation and other endowments. By these He has guided us, and we enter His Kingdom. He has opened the doors of all good before our faces. He has vouchsafed eternal glory. He has summoned us to the Kingdom of heaven. He has enriched us by the bestowals of God. Every day he has proclaimed new glad tidings. Every hour fresh bounties descend.

Consider how all the people are asleep, and ye are awake. They are dead, and ye are alive through the breaths of the Holy Spirit. They are blind while ye are endowed with perceptive sight. They are deprived of the love of God, but in your hearts it exists and is glowing. Consider these bestowals and favors.

Therefore, in thanksgiving for them ye must act in accordance with the teachings of Bahá'u'lláh. Ye must read the Tablets--the Hidden Words, Ishráqát, Glad Tidings--all the holy utterances, and act according to them. This is real thanksgiving, to live in accord with these utterances. This is true thankfulness and the divine bestowal. This is thanksgiving and glorification of God.

I hope you all may attain thereto, be mindful of these favors of God and be attentive. It is my hope that I may go away from New York with a happy heart, and my heart is happy when the friends of God love each other, when they manifest the mercy of God to all people. If I see this, I shall go away happy.

Salutations!

('Abdu'l-Bahá, The Promulgation of Universal Peace, p. 236-7)

So whether or not we voice our thanks at any particular time, it behooves us to be thankful always.